Woah... k...
I'm kinda lost for words on this one, your style for some reason reminds me of an artist I forget the name of and Roah Dahl with a modern twist added to it. Not much to say on the story really since you clearly went for a parody version of 'generic normal guy turns hero' story but the style is awesome.
It's neither ugly and inexperienced nor flawlessy polished to death, its somewhere inbetween . Not much more to say really, it's an interesting style you use, the only complaints are more technical ones like you friends recordings sound a lot still like they're straight from a microphone if that makes sense. There also seems to be some kind of problem with sound and animation timings and besides jack I never really saw much frame by frame, but hey it's your first submission if there wasn't areas for improvement it would make you a freak of nature! x.x